It's about that time again to share my teaching gems.
10.
I just have to say- this week has been INSANELY crazy with Homecoming and festivities.
There wasn't school on Monday, which throws things off...
Wednesday was a half day...
the kids are on no kind of schedule and are in the mind frame that they shouldn't have to do anything all week.
Yeah right!
Yesterday I wanted to throw in the towel...
and then today the best thing happened!
One of my problem students was switched out of my class.
Halle-freakin-lujah
9.
Along with things being insane... we've had some exciting things happen at school.
I found alcohol in my dressing room on top of the lockers.
Wrapped in a brown paper bag and all :)
A gun was brought to school a few weeks ago.
Exciting....
and a little scary.
Fire alarm was pulled today during a passing period-
sending 3,500 students outside with no supervision.
Isn't pulling a fire alarm with no fire a federal offense?
8.
I love, love, love it when my students are police for me.
It gives me a break from yelling at students when they do it for me!
"Girl! Your booty be hangin' out of them shorts!"
"All the black girls need to shut their mouths!"
"Why you not be dressin' out? You can't dance in a dress!"
7.
I don't know if this is normal...
maybe someone can correct me...
but at the high school I went to- Homecoming Royalty was decided by a vote of the student body.
Everyone was on the ballot.
Here?
They "run" for Homecoming Royalty.
Just like you "run" for a student body office!
I think it's so bizarre...
6.
Sometimes when feeling lazy, I wonder what other jobs are like...
For example-
The lady that gives the traffic updates on the radio.
Is that all she does?
"Good morning- there's slight congestion on the freeway... So yeah. You should avoid that route."
Sounds posh :)
On the other hand- I pass by a doggy daycare on the way home...
and I do not envy those workers standing out in the sun with 50 dogs slobbering all over them.
5.
One of my students came in during her lunch period to finish an assignment.
She sat in my office and used my computer.
When I came back in I found my white out tape DESTROYED!
No decency.
Best part?
"Lashaundra... did you mess with my white out tape?"
"What? No... "
"So... you're telling me that before you sat down in my office- my white out tape was working. Now you come out- and it's destroyed."
"I didn't touch it!"
"You're sure?"
"Well.... I thought it was broken... so I pulled it all out."
Really? Really?
Punk.
4.
I love eavesdropping on overhearing conversations...
Students were talking about having babies and what people are "allowed" into the hospital with you.
Girl #1- "Well I heard that you are only allowed to have IMMEDIATE family in there with you while
have the baby?"
Girl #2- "Really? What does that mean?"
Girl #1- "It means that only people you are related to can go in... so not even your HUSBAND can come in with you because he's not immediate family."
BAHAHAHAHA
3.
I never knew how long I could hold my bladder...
until I became a teacher.
I'm seriously impressed with myself.
2.
"Mrs. Brame can you open my locker?"
"You don't know how to open your locker, yet?"
"No you gave me a new one...."
"You still turn it right first, then left, then right..."
"Oh... for real? But the numbers are higher than the last locker combination I had so I don't know how."
.....
"You don't know how to count past ten? Or what's the problem?"
(Ok I didn't really say that last one BUT that's what went through my head!)
1.
Student walks up to classroom still dressed in their regular school clothes...
Me- "Turn your butt around and go get dressed."
Student- "MISSSSSSSS.... uuugggggh."
Me- "Go get dressed."
Student- "But Miss I'm early and there's no one in the locker room, yet!"
Me- "So go enjoy the peace and quiet."
Student- "But Miss there are ghosts in there!"
Me- "....... oh really?......"
Student- "Yes there are ghosts in there and they might rape me!"
I have no response for such ridiculousness.
They're crazy!